A Touch of the Mondays

I'm sure you've all read in the papers about the Auton government's cuts to just about everything. Our plastic leaders have decided in their esteemed wisdom to cut spending on services, benefits, oxygen production, etc to help the country lurch back into prosperity. I understand part of their plan is to take a portion of the newly unemployed electorate (preferably Labour voters) and sell their organs around the world. They've already decided to turn part of the Olympics into a body parts expo for Mad Scientists from around the globe. While enjoying some light entertainment in the form of sport, you too can choose from a variety of the disenfranchised to transform into monstrous undead armies.

Because I work with the homeless our contracts are tied to councils, so we always expected to be hit by the cuts. I especially knew that I would, as I'm employed through an agency so changing me around was alot easier than a full time staff member. Just before I go on I'd like the record to show I'm not in the slightest bit bitter at the company I work for. I was originally only going to be employed for four months and over a year later I'm still there. They've also kept me abreast of everything and been really really good to me. ANYWAY recently it was agreed by the council I work for that I should go down to four days a week.

Now initially my thoughts went to money. But the difference in pay wasn't too grand, and I could still afford the same amount of UHU and donkey porn I had become accustomed to. So my next thought was that this actually was a blessing. I had been gifted an eternal three day weekend. I could devote a day a week to doing the stuff I never had time to do during the week, like for example writing. Unfortunately for writing there's something else going on in my life currently.

On February fifth I'm due to become a father for the first time. Now this isn't me moaning about having no time. That would be a massive dick move. It is an absolute blessing (every time I type that I want to type BLESSED) and we very much made the choice to have a baby. Apart from anything else I'm so fucking happy and excited about it coming I could never resent the little beggar. But I digress, my Mondays "off" have become an insane cacophony odd jobs, appointments and site visits.

That's right, site visits. On top of us about to have a kid, a full time job, and trying to finish this comic pitch; we've moved out of our house as it's completely remodelled. Complete re-wire, new bathroom, new kitchen, adding a new utility room, and loft conversion. Suffice it to say, just a bit going on. God love our builders, they are bloody quick and we're in week four and re-wire is almost done.

Today is a good example of how my Mondays look. Had to be up early as a very kind friend has given us a nursing chair for free, so no sleep in. My wife has her 38 week check-up (she's actually 39 weeks and 2 days for those counting) at 11am. After that it's straight to the building site so I can start sorting stuff in my loft as tomorrow I have to clear it with my (long suffering) father, so work can begin up there. At 1.30 we have a kitchen designer coming in, and after he's gone I have to finish in the loft before it gets dark as there's no lights in there.

I'd be lying if I said that today was not a typical "free Monday". I know with the baby it will definitely only get worse. But this isn't me complaining. It's more me charting my life and offering up a little window into why I'm constantly putting off "proper" writing.

So if there's a point to all this (which there probably isn't) I would like to offer some advice to prospective parents. In the closing months of 2010, while knowing full well we were expecting I: moved house, learnt to drive, started major dental work to make my smile not like a Universal Monster's, and completed my grade six musical theatre exam. This on top of a full time job and a very pregnant wife who can't do much (she's amazing and I'm happy to work twice as hard for her.) My advice is this. Don't make the same "mistakes" we did. If you're thinking of trying for a child, get certain things locked down first. Need to learn to drive? Do it first. Want to move or have work done on your place? Get it sorted first. The pressure you feel at this little person coming into the world is indescribable (but I'm gonna give it a go.) You will go through every range of emotion possible. Your wife/partner will need so much help it's unreal. And all that stuff about not being able to sleep when the baby comes, while true, is also an understatement. I'm sure little Baby Zee will keep us up, but also be prepared not to sleep for the last couple of months of the pregnancy. She will be so uncomfortable that she will toss and turn all night, as well as visiting the loo every ten minutes. If you're a light sleeper like me, resign yourself to getting 3-4 hours a night max.

So in summation. I've got lots on, if you've got the choice don't do everything at the same time. Though I'm happy as Larry, I'd kill for some rest.

Laters
Matt

*All photos loving pinched from Google. Thanks to all actual owners. Obviously that is my real 20 week baby scan.